Council file · H-01 · Casting

Hammerhead’s casting file

Half human, half hammerhead shark, and no, not the good half. A friendly rival from the same line of business. He would call it a nemesis. That’s a word he says.

A small yellow 3D-printed articulated hammerhead shark held in two hands, one of them in a blue cast — Hammerhead, attending Day 4 in person, at scale.

Name: Hammerhead
Species: Half human, half hammerhead shark. Not the good half (2022). Not the good way around (2026).
Relationship: Friendly rivalry. “Nemesis” is his word. The two met at Villain Con, same line of business.
Known haunts: The patent department. “Must be a fish thing.”
Headshot: Received. Side-on. Both sides, separately.
Hearing: Excellent. He hears everything. It’s the head.
Status: Awaiting news. Somebody has to break it to him.

On the record, year by year

2021. Hammerhead was a speaker at Villain Con; the host hadn’t signed up (“I was just lazy this year”) and worried the rivalry would suffer. The sign-off settled it: we’re still enemies.

2022. His 2021 talk was “a real snooze fest, even the Council”, and the Council made a public statement about it just to punish him. The host spoke in the slot ahead of him. The K Cider deal went the host’s way again.

2023. The question was put to him on tape: “Hammerhead, why are you inviting that loser back again?” No valid answer was given.

2025. Hammerhead was shipped to the Sahara by clerical error while the host went to space. His letters from the desert “would melt the heart of even the blackest of souls”. The host promised to look at the Sahara from space, and forgot.

2026: the casting arc

Hammerhead heard there’s a movie. He hopes for a part. The City of Gold is set on land, which rules him out; he points to a full year on land (the Sahara, a clerical error) as relevant experience, and casting are reviewing it, slowly. For the underwater film, the temple at Yonaguni, casting asked whether he can hold his breath. He asked them the same question.

Day 4: the host holding the yellow hammerhead, beside a casting notice — The audition: take seventeen.

On Day 4 he attended in a pocket and left it without permission, on the seventeenth take. He’d like it known that it was a dive, not a fall, and that it counts as his audition. At the opening ceremony he asked to join the shark tank. He was told it’s for guests. He has asked what that makes him.

Casting notes

Range: Both sides of the head, separately.
Special skills: Swimming. Patents. A full year of land experience.
Can hold breath: Query returned to sender.
Availability: Always. He hears everything.
Decision: Pending. The Council has nominated somebody to break the news. Somebody has declined.

Hammerhead, if you’re reading this: we’re still enemies. Friendly ones. You’d say nemesis.